At a certain point of my life, I’ve gotten ready to gain a better understanding of myself. The clock never stops, “telling the time steadily, sensibly, never too quickly, never too slowly”.*
I started to work on the Consciousness Project. As a large, unified endeavour, it involves sub-projects, such as ‘melancholy’ and ‘calm down’. In each of them, I attempt to explore the following four quadrants of my consciousness.
The first consists in the information that no one else but me knows. Here, I work with my deepest secrets, fears, traumas and then I exhibit them, driven by hope to obtain redemption.
The second entails what others know about myself, but I don´t. Sometimes it´s obvious stuff, yet for some reason I do not perceive or understand these self-evidences, hence the collaboration is essential. It provides a key to change my state of consciousness.
A particular state of common awareness, both others´ and mine, merges into the third component. What others and myself know about me, may seem the easiest to appreciate. However, it is a space to confront perceptions, pre conceptions and my ego. These last three elements compose a fundament of my self-portrait.
Nothingness: the last quadrant.
How much of my story, my personality, my stuff is severely and secretly locked in the darkness and lightness of the consciousness? How to discover it? And why to even bother?
*Trumpton, the beginning of every episode